Slay the Reboot

It's no secret I love Buffy. Without that show, middle school would have been a lot sadder. So I am very protective of the characters and story overall, and I'm nervous about the possibility for a new movie. Even the fact that Joss Whedon isn't involved is deeply troubling. The first Buffy movie was kind of sucky, and that was because Joss's original idea got messed up. The series itself was, in essence, a kind of reboot, and that was hugely successful. This is rebooting the reboot without the factor that made the reboot good. Add to that the fact that all the characters are so associated with these particular actors, and it's a tough project. It's not like Batman, a character played by many actors. For seven seasons, Sarah Michelle Gellar was Buffy. Anthony Stewart Head was Giles. I don't want to see someone else try to pick up these roles.

But that doesn't mean I won't dissect the potential choices.

1) Laura Vandervoort: I don't really know her, but she was on an episode of Are You Afraid of the Dark? That gives her a couple of cool points. Still, that alone isn't enough to make a Buffy.

2) Kristen Stewart: Lots of people don't like her in Twilight, but I think she's a pretty solid actress. Still, she's not bubbly/funny enough for Buffy.

3) Amanda Seyfreid: She was really funny in Mean Girls, but I don't know if she's sassy enough for Buffy. Still, she was on Veronica Mars for a little while, which suggests she gets that humor. She might actually make a good vampire, though--Darla-esque?

4) Vanessa Hudgens: High School Musical is like the anti-Buffy. Buffy asserts that high school is a hellzone. High School Musical asserts that high school constitutes the best years of your life. Vom. Plus Vanessa is a dead fish.

5) Emma Watson: I love Emma's Hermione, but I'm not sure she's got Buffy's sass. She seems a little too reserved; still, not a bad option.

6) Megan Fox: If she gets to be Buffy, I will tear my eyeballs out, Oedipus-style. Megan Fox has to be the worst actress in Hollywood today. The Olsen twins outacted her, for God's sake.

7) Leighton Meester: I haven't seen much of Gossip Girl, but it seems like Leighton might have the snarky thing down. Still, I'm not sure she has Buffy's warmth and charm.

8) Mary Elizabeth Winstead: I don't know her at all. It might be good to cast a relative unknown (like Sarah Michelle Gellar was back in the day) but I can't assert Mary Elizabeth's skills at all.

9) Michelle Trachtenberg: As much as I hated Dawn, I do like Michelle. She's got charm and she does the snarky humor thing well. But I think, for a reboot, it gets confusing when you cast an actress from the original series. Especially when that character was Buffy's little sister.

Really, no one on this list seems like a winner, and there are lots of good actresses here. It's just a sign that they should leave well enough alone, especially when they risk envoking the wrath of Buffy fans from coast to coast.