Fuck You, Groundhog

It's Groundhog Day. Woohoo.

As someone who has a holiday birthday, I don't want to offend anyone who might actually like Groundhog Day. But as someone who lives in the northeast, it's like lemon juice on a paper cut. It's the beginning of Febuary. Snow is on the ground. It will be there for the next three months. Even Easter won't be that warm. And some groundhog has to pop out of the ground to tell me there's six more weeks of winter? Just six? Don't you mean twelve? Why are you mocking me, rodent?!

Psh. Beavers and otters are way better, anyway.

I'll just go put on my mittens now.